“Do the Next Right Thing…”

 

"At the turn from our bedroom into the hallway, there is an old full-length mirror in a wooden frame. I can't help but catch a glimpse of myself as I pass. Turning fully toward the glass, I consider what I see. This reflected version of myself, wet, shaking, rumpled, pinched, and slightly stooped, would be alarming if not for the self-satisfied expression pasted across my face. I would ask the obvious question, 'What are you smiling about?' but I already know the answer: It just gets better from here." --- from Always Looking Up by Michael J. Fox.

Did you happen to watch the television special on "Optimism" hosted by and featuring Michael J. Fox? It was really quite amazing. Here is a man who has had Parkinson's Disease for the past 19 years and fully exhibits all its life-limiting and altering symptoms despite medication, yet by his own definition and obvious outward fruit he is an "incurable optimist". He fully participates in life and continues to learn from and teach others about the deep happiness which can be found from living with the kind of optimism which brings him peace and joy. Regardless of his limitations, this man's value is immeasurable. And his joy is utterly contagious!

The TV program documented visits to people of all ages throughout our country and the world, interviewing them about what makes them happy, and the importance of happiness to them. Most significant was his visit among the people of Bhutan, a small country the size of Switzerland in South Asia in the Himalayan Mountains, bordered by India and China. In addition to and more significant than their GNP (Gross National Product) is their GNH (Gross National Happiness). Really! They have a "Minister of Happiness" in charge of measuring this and working to expand and guard it. These are not financially wealthy people at all, but will lovingly give deeply to everyone from the generosity of their heart. Gross National Happiness is the "guiding philosophy of Bhutan's development process" in their country. They believe happiness is vital and firmly dependent upon good relationships and strong connections with family, friends and faith community. While not a "Christian" nation, this sure sounds familiar, doesn't it?

Being part of the global community, connected and interacting with the outside world, they know "one way or another, change is coming," King Wangchuck told correspondent Barbara Crossette. "Being a small country, we do not have economic power. We do not have military muscle. We cannot play a dominant international role, because of our small size and population and because we are a landlocked country. The only factor we can fall back on . . . which can strengthen Bhutan's sovereignty and our different identity is the unique culture we have." And that is their culture of happiness. Not a "la la la, zippity-do-dah" superficial frivolity happy thing, but a deeper genuine joy and contentment in life, despite all its travails. But do not underestimate the power of happiness! Tourism to Bhutan has grown tremendously as more people long to bask in this kind of love in action, people living out what they believe and sharing themselves and their joyful hospitality with everyone they meet.

This is more than ironic, isn't it? People don't NEED to go half-way around the world to enjoy the comfort, love, hope and happiness of being connected and involved with a family and faith community…specifically OUR church family and faith community. Somehow more people are learning about what can be found in Bhutan, and more people need to know what can also be found inside the doors of the United Church of Penacook.

Once again we find ourselves on the doorstep of summer with its endless possibilities stretching before us. It's not only a time of refreshment, but I always think of it as a time to learn something new, to develop something better about myself and stretch to grow more spiritually deep. This year I've bought a copy of a book I've always meant to read and study but never have. This is my summer to start My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers. It's a devotional book with real meat and potatoes readings for each day of the year which has been revered by Christians as a tool for growth since its first publication in 1935. Let's see what the reading for today's date is. Oh my…it's titled "Out of the Wreck I Rise" taking from the text of Romans 8:35 "Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?" For those of you who own this book, it's for the date of May 19. It's very relevant to what I've been writing about here. These are the last lines of the reading: "Either Jesus Christ is a deceiver and Paul is deluded, or some extraordinary thing happens to a man who holds on to the love of God when the odds are against God's character. Logic is silenced in the face of every one of these things. Only one thing can account for it --- the love of God in Christ. 'Out of the wreck I rise' every time." Wow.

Now comes the question of how do we move forward, upward and outward in the love of Christ in the character of God to live in the peace, love and joy He has for us? And to become contagious Christians in sharing this with everyone we meet? This is one good answer: "Do the next right thing." Here it's well put by author Anne Lamott:
I TOOK A LONG, DEEP BREATH AND WONDERED AS USUAL, WHERE TO START. YOU START WHERE YOU ARE, IS THE SECRET OF LIFE. YOU DO THE NEXT RIGHT THING YOU CAN SEE. THEN THE NEXT."
Amen!

 

 

This is Where I Am Right Now

Friends, thanks to the kindness of a friend (thank you Walt --- you are a GEM!), I now know how to imbed a YouTube performance in a blog post! WOW this is huge stuff for me :-) This is a wonderful performance of an extraordinary song. Please take a few minutes for yourself, turn up your speakers and click on the video link, sit back watch and listen. Not just because of the title of this post, but because…well watch,listen and see. The song is sung by Charice and is called "If I Wrote a Note to God". In this clip, the lyrics appear on the screen as well. You may have seen this performed on Oprah Winfrey's show. She is very young, from an impoverished background and already has been on an astonishing journey. She is simply amazing.

A Story which Should Not Have Happened, but Thankfully Had a Good Ending

As this is a true story, I'll be changing the names of the people involved and not mentioning the name of the hospital.

 

When Carol was a toddler, born to a neighbor nearby, we knew something wasn't *right* with her. Couldn't put my finger on it and these are the times when I try to turn off my counselor/medical brain and try NOT to diagnose people. But still. It wasn't autism, asperger syndrome, cerebral palsy….but something. Carol was a happy child, eager to interact and smiled up at you with huge brown eyes. But when she walked or ran, her gait was odd and her hands tended to flap. I kept hoping the doctors her mother, Justine, took her to would figure it out and that as she grew, she'd be fine. This was my hope, it was my prayer, but it was not to be.

As time passed Carol developed seemingly normally and was a very creative, happy child. But still there was…something. She was imaginative and enjoyed engaging with me for tea parties, reading from her books, and playing with her dolls. She was not developmentally disabled, made friends easily, and enjoyed school. One Christmas she was so fascinated with our nativity set that I loaned it to her family so she could enjoy it through the season. She liked making up stories about Mary and Joseph, the Kings and shepherds and moving the characters around near Jesus in the manger.

When Carol was about 8 she began having petit mal seizures which were generally preceded by her saying she saw characters from her story books. Immediately before a seizure she'd usually say, "I see Pinnocchio….." and then it began. As these were petit mal seizures, they did not include more than her standing still, seeming to stare off in the distance and lose touch with her surroundings for a few moments. Sometimes there was also a bit of the hand flapping. Her mother Justine added a pediatric neurologist to Carol's list of doctors. After batteries of tests and a regimen of medications, Carol's seizures were controlled for quite a while. She went to school, made friends, played imaginatively, loved to learn new things and was a happy little girl. Still….there was something I could not put my finger on. When she ran, her gait was strange with her legs overly wide apart and she swayed from side to side. From time to time, the hand flapping also accompanied the running or would happen when she was happily excited about something. I wasn't asked for an opinion, and I knew she was under the care of at least 3 physicians, so I didn't comment. I mean, it was all pretty obvious. What was I going to say…do you notice the odd gait and flapping movements? Have you brought these to the attention of the physicians, particularly the neurologist? Justine and her husband Steve were well educated people with much concern for Carol. I wasn't going to sound like a jerk and bring up this stuff without it being mentioned first by them. Personally, I had concerns that she should have been seen by a pediatric neurologist who sees more complex cases like this on a regular basis (like at Boston Children's) but I didn't feel it was for me to say.

Time passed and Carol's seizures were no longer being well controlled by her medications. Different meds were tried with varying results, but still the seizures not only continued, but they worsened. There was no predicting them and they grew more severe. From petit mal seizures, they became a more worrisome kind referred to as status seizures. More trips to the pediatric neurologist, more meds. More prayers from me.

Suddenly in the middle of the night our phone rang and it was Justine calling me in a panic. She'd already called the hospital. "Come quick! Carol's having continuous seizures and I don't know what to do!" I set a record for throwing on a sweater and jeans, grabbed purse and car keys and with my car running at her house, yelled for Justine who was holding Carol, to get in. We were going to a hospital in a nearby city, it was 3:15 AM with zero traffic, and this was much faster than waiting for the ambulance service in our area. It was a straight shot. I knew I could get us there in a flash. Carol continued to seize off and on and in minutes we were at the Emergency Room entrance, just as Carol went into respiratory arrest.

I parked the car while Justine raced Carol into the ER where they were ready for her. She was there for a while being stabilized. I got to sit down and be thankful. Although it wasn't a holiday or a weekend, the hospital was busy, and the pediatric ICU where Carol was soon admitted was understaffed for the number of patients they were caring for. I accompanied Justine and the staff with Carol in the elevator as we went up to pediatric ICU. Carol's seizures were still not under control. I asked, "Has her pediatric neurologist seen her yet?" No "Has she been called?" Yes "When is she anticipated?" Anytime now (said with irritation by the staff member on one end of the gurney).

Soon Carol was settled into a *room* in pediatric ICU and Justine and the two staff (I was unclear if either were nurses) were on their way out, leaving me there alone with Carol who was still having seizure after seizure. "WAIT!!!!" I said. "Who's going to be caring for Carol?" I sort of barked. The two staff looked at one another, we all looked at the two ICU nurses who were flying around from crisis to crisis in the beds around us, and then their eyes settled on me. "Justine said you used to be a paramedic. That true? You drive like one". I said yes…..but my license has been expired for a long time. They inquired, "You still know how to suction a patient and take vitals, though, don't you?" I couldn't believe what was happening. I'm this woman in jeans and a sweater, they've seen no ID, no credentials, I could be Jaqueline the Ripper for all they knew….did they know how to spell "l-i-a-b-i-l-i-t-y"? And mom (Justine)? She said "I need to go have a cigarette. I'll be outside".

I said certainly, I know how to suction a patient but I'll be expecting one of those nurses in here every few minutes and…PLEASE call the neurologist and tell them Dr. Brook says this is an EMERGENCY and she needs to be here NOW. Carol was having status seizures and those are very dangerous and can cause brain damage.

All night long, I comforted and cared for Carol and every few minutes she'd seize and I'd suction. But I wasn't recording any vitals. Nah-uh. If the nurses weren't in there in a timely fashion, I'd call them and one would come in and take care of those details. I was committed to doing my absolute best for this little girl, but I wasn't putting my name on anything. This was just too surreal and bizarre.

And Justine? Never saw her again all night long. Apparently she had lots of cigarettes to smoke outside. I do know this is REALLY hard on parents, but come ON. She never even came up once to check on her daughter. And the pediatric neurologist? Shortly after 8:00 AM she rolled in. I could not freakin' believe it. I gave her an overview of how the night had progressed while she read the chart and then I left. I called a nearby friend and she came and gave me a ride home. I had nothing to say to Justine beyond the fact her doctor was with her daughter now, receive her "thanks" and say goodbye. A story which should not have happened, but thankfully had a good ending.

NOW what do we do???

 

 

You won't believe this. A friend introduced me to "Facebook" as an online way to connect with friends and re-connect with people you haven't seen in years. It's been kind of fun! The other evening, I did a search for people from a high school where I'd very much enjoyed the students in my chorus. Presto – there was the name of a girl who'd been a rather brilliant accompanist for me. Anything I put before her, she could play. Angie got so she could almost read my mind during warm-ups. We made a wonderful team, and here she was on Facebook! I sent her a quick note with a friend invitation and was a bit stunned by her reply. Clearly she had been shocked as her response read, "I don't want to seem rude, but is this a joke? I had been told that you had…passed away some years ago." WOW. How often do you get a note like that? Quickly I wrote back to let Angie know that I am fine and dandy and was sorry to stun her. She was so apologetic because especially at a class reunion she had shared with others this news she'd heard about me and she wanted to find a way to rectify the situation. Soon she'd posted this note on Facebook about me: "…just wanted to let you know the story that Karen Brook Westhaver had passed away is totally false! She is very alive and well and also here on Facebook…". Soon emails and Facebook friend invitations from other former chorus students began pouring in and I was inundated with lovely notes and fond memories and stories from our time together in chorus. In a way, it was kind of like my own personal little Easter! True, thankfully no crucifixion had been involved, but after lots of people had thought I'd died and existed only in their memory, suddenly here I am alive in their present!

Are you a bit in the doldrums after Lent is over and Easter is past? Although Easter is officially 50 days long until we get to the celebration of Pentecost, still…it sure feels "in between". If we have that "what do we do now?" kind of feeling, can you imagine how the disciples must have felt right at this time? Think about it. Jesus had been crucified, they'd learned about His resurrection but…what now? What were they to do now?

If we are honest about it, this is pretty much where we live a lot of the time. What are we supposed to do now? Does what we do have any meaning, purpose or benefit? How can God use us? And, with our very human times of doubting, does He even WANT us? What are we good for, anyway? Isn't it much better all the way around if we just sleep in on Sundays, keep our eyes on our work and entertainment the rest of the time, and forget about finding ways to participate in church, let alone sharing with others the benefit of belonging to a church family? Ah, my friends, this is where I get to share with you one of my favorite stories in the Bible.

In John 20: 19-29 We learn that the disciples had been gathered behind locked doors (in fear). "Jesus came in and stood among them. He said, "May peace be with you!" ²⁰ Then he showed them his hands and his side. The disciples were very happy when they saw the Lord.  ²¹ Again Jesus said, "May peace be with you! The Father has sent me. So now I am sending you. [emphasis mine]" ²² He then breathed on them. He said, "Receive the Holy Spirit." Can you even begin to imagine their relief at having actually seen Jesus in such a personal way? But did you also notice that Jesus had a purpose larger than to reassure them: He came to commission them, to "send them out". It was now time for them to do the work of spreading the gospel and growing the church. Them. The *regular* people in their own way, empowered by the Holy Spirit, yes, but now they were to do the sharing without being in the background while Jesus taught. But the story gets even better. Here's where it REALLY relates to you and me and where we so often are.

In the encounter above, the disciple Thomas was not with the group. The following week, though, he was there when Jesus next came to be with them. Again, everyone was gathered with the door locked but still Jesus entered, passing through the door. He said, "May peace be with you!" ²⁷ Then he said to Thomas, "Put your finger here. See my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe. ²⁸ Thomas said to him, "My Lord and my God!" ²⁹ Then Jesus told him, "Because you have seen me, you have believed. Blessed are those who have not seen me but still have believed."

Although Thomas had been told by the disciples of Jesus' earlier visit with them, still he was unconvinced. And Jesus' response to him? No lecturing, no punishing, no turning away, but He gave Thomas the most intimate invitation of all. BECAUSE of Thomas' doubt, Jesus invited him to put his hand into His side and the nail marks in His hands. So, friends, here's the deal. Jesus gives us ALL the same invitation. He yearns for us to become so close to Him that we become part of His body. And, being equipped with the Holy Spirit, our part of the bargain is the same as the disciples: we are now sent out. Throughout the Bible, the meekest, the weakest, the youngest and the oldest were among those who made the biggest difference in the growth and nurture of the church. Think of Abraham and Sarah who at 90+ became the parents of all the tribes of Israel. Considering of all this, who are any of us NOT to step up and step out? NOW what do we do? We roll up our sleeves, step out and in doing so, we receive the greatest blessing of all. Happy Easter-living all year long!

It’s just my opinion, and I could be wrong, but Word 2007 is DIABOLICAL – a rant

 

 

Not that I was crazy about it, but I could make Word 2003 work for me. But THIS! Whoever invented Word 2007 must truly be sadistic. Unbelievable!

So, can I just get it out of the way and say how much I HATE Word 2007??? GRRRRR!!!!!!!! WHY oh WHY did they have to make it so darned illogically different from Word 2003?????

 
 

Whatever ever happened to "auto save" when you messed up and stupidly forgot to save a document even though you were only a third done????? Whatever happened to that delightful function when you opened a new document it would show you the last one you were working on as another "fail safe" if you'd *lost* it????? Okay, okay. I finally figured out how to practically do an archeological dig to locate the auto-save function and how to adjust it. And did so. But, it happened, AGAIN!!!

 
 

GONE. My carefully crafted document with lists of music and composers which I've been plugging away at, my list of ALL the music (more than 29 pieces) I played on Good Friday which was recorded by some hoop-di-doo (I shouldn't joke....I'm extremely flattered they sent this very gifted, talented sound engineer who knows how to professionally and gorgeously do microphone placement especially for Steinways --- I'm just VERY frustrated, if you couldn't already tell) to record this whole event for later play-back(s) on WKXL. See, I hadn't made an actual list of all this music. For smoothness in turning to each piece seamlessly and as quietly as possible, I'd just chosen my order and numbered/placed a bunch of post-it notes throughout my whole stack of music.

 
 

Jack (at WKXL, the guy who'll be doing the playback for his programs.....will likely do this more than once....heck, it's almost 3 hours of music so who knows how many programs it will turn out to be) wanted me to make a list for him all of all the pieces/composers so he could announce them all. I never thought he'd do that. Yikes. So, already, LOTS of pressure long before this word processing program began to torture me. I practiced my brains out for this. Somebody should have just shot me…it's been years since I've played at a sustained concert level like this, and then never this long! See, it wasn't an ego thing. I just thought it would be great free publicity for our church as well as some nice music for the listeners.

 
 

AAAACK!!! Can you believe it? It happened yet again! I'd set the "auto-save" function to do its thing every 5 minutes, but I must type way faster than I thought. Zappo. Somehow it all vanished again but I could only locate 1/3 of it! Back I went and re-adjusted this to auto-save my document literally once every minute, in addition to constantly "saving" it manually myself.

 

Well, the third time must have been, as they say, "the charm", either that or God mercifully took pity on my frazzled brain and intervened. FINALLY the list is intact. I wasn't taking any chances. Not only did I copy/paste it into the body of an email, but I also sent it as an attachment as well. Now we'll see what happened to it when it hit cyberspace!

 

Rant rant rant. I try to persuade myself that learning new things is a good thing. But deep down I ask myself, just why do they have to go and change something just for the sake of making something *new*????? In this case, in my opinion, "new" is most definitely NOT better. Grrrrrr.

The Most Dangerous Chocolate Cake in the World

 

 

My friend Mary sent me this recipe and boy am I glad we're beyond Lent! What am I kidding, in my la-la land of denial. It is SO no "lo-carb", I'm quite positive that just reading this recipe caused some hip swellage! But, as it sounds quite extraordinary and who knows…it could save somebody's terrible chocolate craving, I simply must share! You won't believe how easy it is! You make it in a mug in your microwave! Who'd a thought?? Just consider (or rationalize) about making it as something to share as a special treat with someone else. It'll make you feel less guilty, and who knows – perhaps even a little virtuous! Only like 5 minutes to whip up!

Here goes:

5 MINUTE CHOCOLATE MUG CAKE 4 tablespoons flour  4 tablespoons sugar  2 tablespoons cocoa  1 egg  3 tablespoons milk  3 tablespoons oil  3 tablespoons chocolate chips (optional)  A small splash of vanilla extract  1 large coffee mug (MicroSafe) Add dry ingredients to mug, and mix well.  Add the egg and mix thoroughly.  Pour in the milk and oil and mix well.. Add the chocolate chips (if using) and vanilla extract, and mix again.  Put your mug in the microwave and cook for 3 minutes at 1000 watts. The cake will rise over the top of the mug, but don't be alarmed! Allow to cool a little, and tip out onto a plate if desired. EAT ! (this can serve 2 if you want to feel slightly more virtuous). And why is this the most dangerous cake recipe in the world?  Because now we are all only 5 minutes away from chocolate cake at any time of the day or night!

 

 

 

Small Things Make me Happy

 

Test post --- still trying for paragraphs! Wouldn't that be nice J A small thing to some, but to me, it would be a small chunk of happiness. Perfect, this, in there'd be no calories, fats or other badness…just paragraphs and the ability to actually edit a post so it would look like I want it to. Be more readable, too! That'd be another huge plus.

 

Here goes a paragraph. Let's see it if will publish this way, being a paragraph, that is. You're likely wondering at the significance of the picture with this post. It's a shot from a very cool screensaver I have…perhaps you've seen it somewhere, too. It's an amazingly realistic looking pocket watch submerged with a few coins beneath the surface of a stream. Interestingly enough, the watch always displays the accurate time and date. Periodically a leaf will languidly float by, then another one. Very peaceful. There is sound with this, too, if you'd like. A swirly, swishy attempt at a happy brook type sound. I prefer to run with the sound generally off, or just low enough that I'll hear it when an email clicks into my inbox.

 

Time to publish this "test" to see how it turns out on the

Notes on followup: Well, Houston, we've got paragraphs!!! No picture --- at all --- after two different kinds of attempts, but definitely paragraphs!!! Good for a start.

Now I've got to finish up and hit the hay. LONG day and tomorrow begins a busy week. But way cool...now I can write posts with paragraphs! See what I mean? Small things make me happy :-) Of course to the reader, also, anything which makes reading/and comprehension easier is a good thing. Who'd a-thought I could do it with Windows! Sadly, the scribe fire thing didn't work for me. But...Yay! Now, I'm off to try to sleep.... But wait. Had to give it one more last try. Picture! We got the picture, too! Great way to wind this up and provide a nice foundation of success to lay my head down upon...for that sleep thing which too often eludes me.
blog!